Best Dad Jokes Are So Ridiculous That Youll Laugh Out Loud

70 Best Dad Jokes Are So Ridiculous That You’ll Laugh Out Loud

If either has kids or not, everyone can enjoy the most ridiculous and hilarious dad jokes ever. Is there any kind of humor that can compare to the happiness that a good dad joke gives you? That is not our point of view. dad jokes are unique compared to other jokes. They are intricate and difficult to understand. They are humorous because, when you see them, you can’t determine whether to laugh or grimace at how terribly uncool they are.

Best Dad Jokes Are So Ridiculous That Youll Laugh Out Loud

To find comedy in a dad joke, you essentially need to own a pair of white New Balance sneakers, a cellphone belt clip, and a coffee mug that says, “World’s Best Father.” It was first reported here. That is a dad joke in the truest sense, I agree. Unless, of course, you’re referring to this particular collection of tried-and-true dad jokes. Please email them to the father figure in your life who you are honoring on Father’s Day while you continue reading. He will be overjoyed to learn that you have begun to enjoy his sense of humor.

FamousDad Jokes

“I found a wooden shoe in my toilet today. It was clogged.”

“I’m so good at sleeping I can do it with my eyes closed!”

“Student: “Can I go to the bathroom?” Teacher: “It’s ‘may.'” Student: “No, it’s January.””

“I wish Covid-19 had started in Las Vegas. Because what happens in Vegas stays in Vegas.”

funniest one liners and award winning dad jokes
funniest one liners and award winning dad jokes

“What is the tallest building in the world? The library—it’s got the most stories.”

“I tell dad jokes but I have no kids…I’m a faux pa!”

“One of my favorite memories as a kid was when my brothers used to put me inside a tire and roll me down a hill. They were Goodyears!”

“After dinner, my wife asked if I could clear the table. I needed a running start, but I made it!”

“Why did the old man fall in the well? Because he couldn’t see that well!”

“I hate it when people say age is only a number. Age is clearly a word.”

The Very Best Dad Jokes And Puns
The Very Best Dad Jokes And Puns

“An apple a day keeps the doctor away. At least it does if you throw it hard enough.”

“I don’t play soccer because I enjoy the sport. I’m just doing it for kicks!”

“Why do Dads take an extra pair of socks when they go golfing? In case they get a hole in one.”

“Spring is here! I got so excited I wet my plants!”

“I’m reading a horror story in braille. Something bad is going to happen, I can just feel it.”

“What kind of music did the pilgrims listen to? Plymouth rock.”

“A slice of apple pie is $2.50 in Jamaica and $3.00 in the Bahamas. These are the pie rates of the Caribbean.”

“Why was the coach yelling at a vending machine? He wanted his quarter back.”

“I’ll call you later. Don’t call me later, call me Dad!”

“”Grandson, watch how far I can kick this bucket.””

funny dad jokes thatll have the whole family in stitches
funny dad jokes thatll have the whole family in stitches

“I think my wife is putting glue on my antique weapons collection. She denies it but I’m sticking to my guns!”

“If two vegans get in a fight, is it still considered a beef?”

“Some people can’t distinguish between etymology and entomology. They bug me in ways I can’t put into words.”

“A woman is on trial for beating her husband to death with his guitar collection. The judge asks her, “First offender?” She says, “No, first a Gibson! Then a Fender!””

“Did I tell you the time I fell in love during a backflip? I was heels over head!”

“What concert costs just 45 cents? 50 Cent featuring Nickelback!”

“Did you hear about the guy who invented Lifesavers? They say he made a mint!”

“I used to work in a shoe-recycling shop. It was sole destroying!”

“What do you call an ant that has been shunned by his community? A socially dissed ant.”

“This graveyard looks overcrowded. People must be dying to get in there!”

“What did the Ranch say when someone opened the refrigerator door? “Close the door, I’m dressing!””

“I ordered a chicken and an egg from Amazon. I’ll let you know.”

“If towels could tell jokes, I think they’d have a very dry sense of humor.”

“Not to brag but I made six figures last year. I was also named worst employee at the toy factory.”

“My friend was showing me his tool shed and pointed to a ladder. “That’s my stepladder,” he said. “I never knew my real ladder.””

“I invented a new word today: Plagiarism!”

“What do sprinters eat before a race? Nothing, they fast!”

“I didn’t want to believe that my dad was stealing from his job as a traffic cop, but when I got home, all the signs were there.”

“I was playing chess with my friend and he said, “Let’s make this interesting.” So we stopped playing chess.”

“Do you know the last thing my grandfather said to me before he kicked the bucket?”

“I don’t really call for funerals that start before noon. I guess I’m just not a mourning person!”

“Which U.S. state is famous for its extra-small soft drinks? Minnesota!”

“I slept like a log last night. Woke up in the fireplace!”

“I never buy pre-shredded cheese. Because doing it yourself is grate.”

“My boss told me to have a good day, so I went home!”

“How many apples grow on a tree? All of them!”

“My doctor told me I was going deaf. The news was hard for me to hear.”

“What rhymes with boo and stinks? You!”

“My friend says to me, “What rhymes with orange?”And I told him, “No it doesn’t!””

“If an English teacher is convicted of a crime and doesn’t complete the sentence, is that a fragment?”

“My hotel tried to charge me ten dollars extra for air conditioning. That wasn’t cool.”

“A guy goes to his doctor because he can see into the future. The doctor asks him, “How long have you suffered from that condition?” The guy tells him, “Since next Monday.””

“When does a joke become a dad joke? When it becomes apparent.”

“What rock group has four men that don’t sing? Mount Rushmore.”

“What’s brown and sticky? A stick!”

“I just watched all the Harry Potter movies back to back with a friend. It maybe wasn’t the best idea, because it meant I couldn’t see the TV.”

“I’m starting a new dating service in Prague. It’s called Czech-Mate.”

“A cheese factory exploded in France. Da brie is everywhere!”

“Why couldn’t the green pepper practice archery? Because it didn’t habanero.”

“I would avoid the sushi if I were you. It’s a little fishy!”

“Imagine if you walked into a bar and there was a long line of people waiting to take a swing at you. That’s the punch line.”

“Why do vampires seem sick? They’re always coffin.”

“Why did the invisible man turn down the job offer? He couldn’t see himself doing it!”

“Within minutes, the detectives knew what the murder weapon was. It was a briefcase.”

“What’s a ninja’s favorite type of shoes? Sneakers!”

“Why is Peter Pan always flying? He neverlands!”

“If you see a robbery at an Apple Store does that make you an iWitness?!”

“Five out of four people admit they’re bad with fractions!”

“Have you heard about those new corduroy pillows? They’re making headlines.”

“This morning, Siri said, “Don’t call me Shirley.” I accidentally left my phone in Airplane mode!”

“Why do dogs float in water? Because they are good buoys.”

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